Love Letter to Myself for the New Year

Hi friend:

I see you sitting there in your yoga pants contemplating the past, present and future.  Let it go.  It's time to focus on 2018, its all about you.  This year you're going to be selfish and you're not going to feel guilty about it.  Since becoming a mother almost five years ago, you have made life about everyone else but yourself.  You've devoted all your hours, minutes and seconds to your family.  This year, you are going to give yourself the same unconditional love you give others.  In order to love others to your full potential, you must first love yourself.  Being selfish is not going to make you a "bad" mom or wife.  It's actually going to make you happier, centered and accomplished.

First on the list, stop trying to attain perfection.  You put so much unnecessary pressure on yourself when in reality, you are the only one who notices if your rug has crayon marks, if the dishes aren't done or if you're not perfectly put together {every. single. day}.  I understand you can't help but obsess over  the "perfect lives" on Instagram but remember, its easy to play pretend on social media. There's no way that mother, with those five children, has a perfectly organized house every day. Don't be so hard on yourself.  It's completely fine to let your son eat chips off the floor or to allow your daughter to eat  Oreos for dinner. It's called survival mode and you're rocking the shit out of it.

Second, your business is going to BOOM and not in the way you think. Fringed Haven is your passion project. You started it to inspire people, build relationships and beautiful spaces.  When something is created out of passion and authenticity, it grows on its own and that is what you've manifested.  This year strive to connect with people on a deeper level by building trust and friendships in order to deliver beyond their expectations.

Third, read, read and read some more.  Not a magazine or social media posts, actual books.  Put down the phone and pick up a book.  There are so many things that interest you - spirituality, Buddhism, architecture, design, cooking....read about it, learn about it.  Remember those corny commercials  with the stars floating across the screen and the tag line 'the more you know' popping up? Knowledge is power.

Fourth, write, write, write.  Commit to writing at least one blog post a week.  Your readers have expressed their fondness in your writing. Give the people what they want will you?  At the very least, keep a journal handy and write down your thoughts throughout the day.  Great ideas pop into your mind all the time but exhaustion at the end of the day seems to vanish them.  Don't let the next big "thing" slip your mind.

Fifth, get your ass into the yoga studio, like yesterday.  Remember when yoga was your thing?   Remember how it makes you feel?  How it grounds you, relaxes you, helps you sleep?  I'm sure you would love to feel that bliss again.  I mean, you already have your yoga pants on. Put them to good use.

Most importantly {and I stole this quote from somewhere but I can't remember where}, "stop saying YES to shit you hate."  More so, just stop saying yes to anything you really want to say NO to.  It's alright if you just want to stay home on a Saturday night, or if you don't want to schedule a play date with that mom you don't really like, or if you rather not attend the networking event.  Declutter your life and only say yes to what truly makes you happy.

2018 is going to be about spiritual understanding and personal growth.  Peace, love and happiness in New Year!

xx,

Me

Our Christmas

I almost fell out of my chair when I realized it's been 5 months since my last post.  Major props to those mom warriors that post every day.  Please tell me, what's your secret? Well, there's no time like the present, and 5 days after Christmas, to give you a look into our holiday decor and family photo shoot.  Procrastination at its finest, I know.  Clearly I'm not great at this blogging thing.

So originally, I planned on decorating #allwhiteeverything,  like a chic winter wonderland in a farmhouse somewhere in the country.  I took my daughter shopping to help me pick out Christmas decor and all went south quickly.  She wanted everything red and green, my least favorite.  I gave in of course being that she's only 4 and one day she won't really care what color I choose to decorate the house.

 I love the shelf above our TV because I treat it like a mantel.  Again, as if I were in the country and the mantel was really above the chimney.  I change the decor with the seasons.

Every year, we get tons of Christmas cards.  This year I actually purchased a little something to place the cards and we received only like 5.  Bummer.  I guess I shouldn't complain when we went virtual with ours this year sent via text.

Who else but Target would have these fabulous pom-pom pillow with Christmas trees?

This kid hates photo shoots.  I die with this photo though, that pout.

We tried a little something different this year for our shoot, thanks to our photographers suggestion.  I am in love with the way it came out.

Check out the story behind these initials on my Instagram, in case you missed it. They're extra special.

Hoping you had a wonderful holiday season with your loved ones.  Now, it's time to relax and enjoy the next week or so before the New Year.

XOXO

Photo cred: Aragon Photography





SaveSave

The Garden

I'm into gardening lately.  Wait, that's a lie.  I am into eating the food that's flourishing in our garden. It tastes that much sweeter knowing it's truly organic and pesticide free.  Since having our kids, I've become that much pickier as to what goes into our mouths.  Except when I'm scarfing down pizza and beer.  I mean, who doesn't NEED pizza and beer occasionally?

I've always dreamt of having a garden where I can source our food from.  Let me preface by saying I really, really, really dislike bugs {trying avoid using the word hate}. I mean, like if there's a spider in my bedroom, on the ceiling, on the other side of the room, I probably won't sleep in that room until it's dealt with.  Obviously, part of gardening is dealing with bugs.  The scary kind of bugs that hide in the dirt and jump out at you when your hands deep.  So although I've always dreamt of having a garden, part of my dream did not include me being the gardener.  Cue in the husband.  We had a little  "sit down" and I took to Pinterest to show him all the garden ideas and inspiration I'd been collecting.  I also kindly asked that he do the gardening, I would do the cooking.  Match made in Heaven.

Our space is not nearly as large as the space in the above photos, but I thought we could make it work.  Andres got to building out the garden.  We saved the seeds from the squash, green and red peppers we'd eaten and he planted those along with carrots, basil and butter leaf lettuce.  I have a confession to make, I'm a bad wife.  I didn't check out his masterpiece until about 6 months after it was done.  I know, shameful (I had an excuse, I was in 'just-had-baby' daze).  When I did go out and have a look :: dreams shattered :: nothing like my inspirational photos.  

Carrots

Green & Red Peppers

I'll admit, my inspiration photos may have been a little ambitious.  I'm actually not even mad because the man's got a green thumb.  He basically took all the seeds and through them in the dirt.  In no particular order.  We've got carrots growing next to peppers and squash just taking over the whole damn party.  We've got a few things sprouting we're not even sure what they are.  He swears he planted basil here {see below}, but it smells nothing like basil.  Somehow though, he's made it work.

Basil??

Squash {we're not sure if it's butternut, spaghetti or pumpkin} 

If you follow me on Instagram stories, you've seen us eat the red peppers and lettuce.  Truly delicious!  I can't wait to pick the carrots and squash.  We've got a big problem with the squash though, the vines are now taking over my backyard.  My daughter thinks Cinderella's carriage and the Fairy Godmother will manifest soon.  I'm just worried it will kill all the other veggies.   Husband has promised me that after everything has sprouted, he will rebuild and replant. For amateur gardeners, we're not doing that bad.  Like how I took some of the credit there?

FASHION FRIDAY: Date Night

We made it to Friday guys and I'm excited to show you two of favorite things. High waist skinnies and off the shoulder tops.  As a mom of two, you will rarely find me this dressed up and put together. I am usually in some form of athleisure running around with the kids.  We actually went out dancing last week and I got to strut this outfit. Feels good to be in heels and not have to worry about the littles spilling food on my outfit. Right before stepping out of the door.  Never fails...

I am pretty petite so finding jeans that actually fit me and don't stretch two extra sizes is a major win. I love these skinnies because they're the right ankle length and inseam for a shorty like me.  Also, they don't stretch. Like, at all.  Some may find that uncomfortable, I think it's perfect (no-one like a saggy booty).  I love them so much, I got them in white too.

I'm in love with this off the shoulder top at an unbelievable price point.  It's a bodysuit too so you know it will never untuck, one of my major pet peeves. Check out these gorgeous earrings from Bauble Bar.  Put these on plus a red lip and you're ready to hit the town.

Top: From Nordstrom (only $35) but no longer available.  

This J Crew one is similar and comes in three colors (I want it)! 

Jeans: Top Shop 

Sunnies: Prada

Earrings:  Bauble Bar but not available,  these are just as good though.

Purse: Zara but longer available. I just got this one for Mother's Day in putty and I'm loving it.  Good for dressing up or down.

Shoes: Steve Madden

Hope you have a fantastic weekend and get out and dance!

Patio Update

Hi all.  Is it just me, or are the weeks flying by?  Since Kev's birthday party in April, feels like I blinked and May is almost over.  We did a lot of hustling before his party to have the patio looking half decent but haven't done much since.  I'm hoping June gives us some down time to get a few things done around the house.  I'm working on a house tour for you as well, along with a nice long list of the projects I have in mind.  Imagine how excited the hubby is about that?  I know he secretly wishes Pinterest would just go away and stop polluting my mind.  Keep dreamin' baby.  

Here's the patio in its current state, desperately begging for a paint job.  So far we've given it two coats of primer and two coats of paint.  It's crazy how much paint the wood soaked up.  I'm thinking it needs two more coats to look completed.  Another thing my husband is thrilled about {insert sarcasm font here}, 2 more coats.  

We prematurely installed two fans so our guests wouldn't melt during Kevin's party.  We'll have to take them down to finalize the painting but they were needed.  We had a hard time finding fans for this space because the roof is only about 7ft.  Not many white/modern/not-ridiculously-tacky fans come with the flush capability.  Amazon to the rescue.

You're probably wondering what that weird, rectangular planter looking thing is right?  Well unfortunately, we have the gas and electricity meter attached to this side of the house.  Hindsight, we could've moved the gas before we laid the cement, but too late.  So, my very creative father built a planter to cover the meters.  It can be removed if needed but for now, it covers those ugly things.  We will eventually paint it white as well and switch out the plants for different ones. Not really feeling the current red ones.

I really can't wait to wrap this up so we can get to the fun part - decorating.  I'm actually having a really hard time planning for this space.  One, it's an exterior space which is not my forte.  Two, I'm trying to be practical about the flooring choice but I am dying over all the tile options these days.  I know that if I choose a patterned colorful tile, I will likely get over it quickly.  I like to change things up and that type of flooring will just limit my options.  But guys, soooooo many beautiful choices every time I browse online and so on trend!  Here are some of my favorites, and I even had a hard time choosing just six.

If you follow me on Instagram, you know I'm obsessed with black and white lately.  However, I don't feel like it would work for my space {or my home}.  If I do end up choosing one of these, it's definitely going to be in the blue family.  Another option, and back to that annoying practicality I mentioned, is to pick a neutral tile or polished concrete and spice it up with an outdoor rug. I was playing around with a few different ideas and came up with this mood board.  I think the dark gray color of the house with the blue tile and pops of yellow will look spectacular.

1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 //

Traditional vs. Trendy - oh the decisions I'm forced to make.  Which would you choose?